I don’t know who said it first — you’ve heard it before — but I like it. ‘To dwell above with the saints in love — ah yes, that will be glory. To live below with the saints I know — well, that’s a dif­ferent story.’

It’s got a ring of truth about it. God’s people can be a difficult lot to live with. It was no different in New Testament days. There were lots of quarrels then, too. There was, for example, a dispute among the widows (Acts 6); there was a dispute between Paul and Barnabas (Acts 15); there was a dispute over the importance of cir­cumcision (Acts 15), and so on! Furthermore, Paul was likely writ­ing his letter to the Romans from the city of Corinth. There was plenty going on in the Corinthian church to make any pastor weep or have a breakdown!

As for the church in Rome, there were obvious differences of opin­ion about special diets and obser­vance of days. Some were meat eaters and some were vegetarians by conviction (2). Some still ob­served the Old Testament holy days while others did not (5). I don’t think by the way, that this was a disagreement about the Lord’s Day — that matter was al­ready settled. More likely it was about the observance of Jewish special days and holidays — e.g. Passover, Pentecost, etc. Obviously Gentile converts felt no com­pulsion to observe these days, while many Jewish converts ob­served them ‘religiously’. These were contentious issues.

I don’t think Passover and Pente­cost are burning issues among us today. However, we have successfully managed to replace these issues with our own hot po­tatoes. We have established our own list of ‘Do’s and Don’ts,’ which as far as we are concerned, is the standard of orthodoxy, and the measure of our fellowship.

Let’s think of a few examples. Some drink alcohol and enjoy glass of wine with a meal — some don’t. Some think that the com­munion wine should be alcoholic — others disagree. Some think com­munion should be every week. Some think the KJV should be the only Bible version used in church. Some think a woman should have long hair and never wear slacks. Some think a man should wear a tie to church and certainly never wear shorts or thongs. Some watch TV on Sunday — others do not. Some think baptism should only be by immersion. Some think we should only pray standing. Some think we should always re­cite the Lord’s Prayer in church. Some think that we should only address God as ‘Thee.’ Some think we should get new soft seat­ing in church; others think we should continue to use the old wooden pews. Some think we should use the overhead projec­tors; others think that’s the thin edge of the wedge. I’m sure you can think of other examples. I’m sure, too, that you (like me) may have a strong opinion about some of these issues. But what are they? Opinions! Paul refers to them as, ‘disputable matters; doubtful things’ (1). These are matters which the Bible does not clearly legislate upon. They are grey areas. Are they important? Not very. They are not primary saving doctrines. They are not about the character of God, nor about the Son of God, nor about the sufficiency and authority of the Bible, nor about the way of salva­tion, not about heaven or hell. Yet they are big enough to create dis­harmony, alienation, and bad feel­ing in the church. Big enough to cause us to be at loggerheads; big enough to divide a congregation and to polarise believers; big enough to cause people to leave a church — or at least to refuse to attend.

How does Paul approach the mat­ter? The first thing to note is that (even though he has a clear conviction on the matter himself — see verse 14), yet he doesn’t take sides. It’s a temptation for any leader to insist on confor­mity to his will; ‘agree with me and you’re in, disagree with me and you’re out!’ There will be areas that we will disagree over. There are however, doctrines that are non-negotiable; these are the primary doctrines that Paul has been writing about in the earlier chapters of this letter. But there are also these grey areas — which are not black and white. When we cannot agree on these matters we may have to compromise. And we must insist on understanding, generosity, tolerance, acceptance, love and maturity.

Paul identifies and addresses the two opposing groups in the church as the ‘weak’ and the ‘strong.’ The distinction has nothing to do with physical strength. The weak are those who are less mature believers; who are weak in knowledge and understanding of their beliefs. The weak are those who have a conscience and scruples about diets and days. They often have a list of taboos which they want to impose on others. They fail to understand the freedom we have in Christ. Ironically, the weak are often blind to their weakness — and usually con­sider themselves as the strong! The ‘strong’ on the other hand, will have a mature understand­ing of their faith and freedom in Christ; they are strong in the ap­plication of their faith — but their temptation is to despise the weak.

As the apostle addresses this matter we discover that the real problem was not about diets or days but about underlying sinful attitudes, as he identifies the sins of arrogance, pride and contempt.

In this chapter Paul lays down certain principles to help us handle our differences. In doing so, Paul was not trying to paper over the cracks so as to create the ap­pearance that there were no differ­ences of opinion. There were ob­vious differences — and it is prob­able that these differences contin­ued to exist. Rather he provides the prescription on how believers, who may hold different opinions, may still enjoy the ‘communion of the saints’.

1. Avoid (if possible) Debates over Doubtful Things (1)⤒🔗

As for the one who is weak, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions.v. 1

Don’t go looking for differences. If you do, you will always find them! Don’t go looking for arguments. Don’t major on the minors. Don’t be a nit-picker. Don’t be a fault finder. Don’t be looking for oppor­tunities to debate doubtful things. Such ‘debate’ only becomes a great distraction from the procla­mation of the gospel; stifles the growth of the church, becomes an excuse for inactivity, and turns many people off from joining the church. Unfortunately the view that many outsiders have of the church is that we are a bunch of silly little people arguing over petty and irrelevant rules and regula­tions.

Paul instructs us to welcome with open arms fellow believers who don’t see things the way you do. Your brother or sister may not dot all your ‘i’s’ or cross all your ‘t’s’; nonetheless, you must accept them (see also 15:7). Jesus said (in another context), ‘what God has joined together let no man put asunder.’  We belong to the same family. (It’s often remarked, ‘You can choose your friends — but you can’t choose your family’.) We have the same Saviour. We have the same hope. We will spend eternity together (when we will agree on everything) — so we should get used to it now!

2. Don’t Despise Others (3)←⤒🔗

Let not the one who eats de­spise the one who abstains, and let not the one who abstains pass judgement on the one who eats, for God has welcomed him.v. 3

We are not to despise those whose views differ from us. This prohibition applies to both the strong and the weak. Neither side is to despise the other. Usually both sides think they are right and despise the other. For example, when the strong see the scruples of the weak they might think, ‘Don’t be silly, don’t be so childish, don’t be so petty, don’t be so nar­row-minded, etc.’ The temptation for the strong is to feel proud and to pour sarcasm upon the weak. The weaker brother must be care­ful not to shoot his brother down. When the weak see the strong doing those things that they them­selves consider wrong, they might think, ‘Don’t be so worldly!’ ‘What kind of a witness is that?’ ‘See how lax and liberal they are!’ This should not happen in the church. Remember God has wel­comed each one of us into His family and His church. If the Lord has received a brother, how dare we reject him or refuse to have full fellowship with him. It’s not our business to cross people off God’s guest list.

3. Each Should be Clear in His Own Mind (5)←⤒🔗

Each one should be fully con­vinced in his own mind. v. 5b

Each of us has a responsibility to be fully convinced in his or her own mind. Paul was — see verse 14. What should we be convinced of? Convinced we are right? No. We should be convinced that the view that we hold is based on a thorough and accurate under­standing of God’s Word. There is no excuse for ignorance or lazi­ness or prejudice. If we haven’t bothered to search the Scriptures to support our view, nor sought help and advice from trusted counsellors, then we are just plain arrogant. We should be able to explain scripturally the reason for our actions. We should always seek to respect the conscience of another. We should remember that the one who eats and the one who doesn’t, do so for the same reason — to honour the Lord (8). We might say that though their actions might be misguided, ‘their heart is in the right place.’

4. Who are you to Judge? (10)←⤒🔗

Why do you pass judgement on your brother? Or why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgement seat of God. vs. 10b-12

He says to the weak, ‘Why do you judge your brother?’ He says to the strong, ‘Why do you despise your brother?’ You are not responsible for the words or actions of your brother — you are only responsible for how you re­spond. God is Judge. Leave the judgement to Him. We dare not presume to take God’s place. Each of us will have to front up before Him. Each one of us is accountable and respon­sible to God. He will have the final audit. If we remember this it will prevent us going through life trying to put everyone else right, while neglecting to exam­ine our own attitudes and ac­tions.

5. Watch Out for Others (13)←⤒🔗

Never put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.v. 13b

In the exercise of your conviction you must have regard for your brothers and sisters. You must not be responsible for causing another to fall. This warning is delivered particularly to the strong who understand their spiritual freedom. But that free­dom need not always be exer­cised. They were free to eat meat — even (as Paul implies) the ‘bargain’ meat offered to idols! ‘But if your brother is grieved by what you eat; you are no longer walking in love’ (15). Exercising your freedom may not be in the interests of your brother or sister. Paul’s own policy was, ‘if food is a cause of my brother’s falling I will never eat meat, lest I cause my brother to fall’ (1 Cor. 8:13) — and this de­spite his persuasion that no food was per se off limits. In food and social customs generally, he adapted himself to the company he was in (1 Cor. 9:19-23). Lu­ther got it right, I believe, when he said of Christian liberty, ‘a Chris­tian man is a most free lord of all, subject to none.’ Then in typical Luther boldness said of Christian charity, ‘a Christian man is a most dutiful servant of all, subject to all.’ If the exercise of my liberty hin­ders another — then I should re­frain. On what principle? The principle of love (15). While we have the freedom in Christ — we are not free to selfishly flaunt it. Does this mean that another’s conscience should dictate my ac­tions? Stott states, ‘Love never disregards weak consciences. Love limits its own liberty out of respect for them.’

6. Get Your Priorities Right (17)←⤒🔗

For the Kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. v. 17

We must get our priorities right. We must see things in perspec­tive. What is the big issue? The ‘eternals’ of righteousness, peace and joy are more important than the externals of eating and drink­ing. We are to hunger and thirst for righteousness. That’s the vi­sion we are to capture. That’s the message we are to communicate.

7. Pursue Peace (19)←⤒🔗

Let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual up build­ing.v. 19

Unity, peace and edification are things we must actively pursue, for to do so is pleasing to the Lord.

8. Keep it Private (22)←⤒🔗

The faith that you have, keep between yourself and God.v. 22

‘Faith in this sense is a firm and intelligent conviction before God that one is doing what is right’ (Bruce). This assumes that we are to hold our convictions (and scruples) on these grey ar­eas privately and discreetly. We are not to make them the bench­mark of fellowship or membership. We are not to broadcast our opin­ions or ram our views down other people’s throats. If and when that happens, then the leadership of the church need to do some­thing!

9. Be Forbearing (15: 1-7)←⤒🔗

‘Forbearance’ isn’t a word we hear much today, but if we learn to practice it, it can become a great weapon in staving off con­tention and friction. To forbear means to show restraint; to be patient in face of provocation; to be long-suffering; willing to put up with people’s actions — to let things go. Many offences (perhaps most?) just need to be overlooked. Many tensions and misunderstandings would vanish if we were more forbearing with one another. Love covers a multitude of sins. The Lord Him­self set us an example to follow (3), and that example has been recorded for us that we can learn forbearance and so learn to persevere with hope (4). God is glorified when we live in har­mony and welcome one another (7).

Behold, how good and pleas­ant it is when brothers dwell in unityPsalm 133:1