Hospitality is one of the most important yet overlooked areas of local church outreach and general congregational life.¹For all our efforts to invite to our churches the “unlearned, or unbelievers” (1 Cor. 14:23), how many first-time visitors leave unconvinced that they could one day be part of our church family? We want to be welcoming. But what we want, what we think we are, and how others perceive us are not always the same. So, what is biblical hospitality, where are our hospitality struggles, and how can we improve?

A Theology of Hospitality⤒🔗

In Hebrews 13:2, the writer says, “Be not forgetful to enter­tain strangers.” The Greek word for “entertain strangers” is elsewhere translated practice “hospitality” (cf. Rom. 12:13, 1 Tim. 3:2, Titus 1:8, 1 Peter 4:9). The term, which literally means “love strangers,” distinguishes the more familiar “brotherly love” (Heb. 13:1) from the affectionate and sacrificial care of someone to whom you have no natural connection or obligation. Moreover, the force of the Greek is negative, as in “do not go on neglecting hospitality.” The Lord is gently chiding believers for failing to be hospitable, reminding us that hospitality is not reserved for the uniquely gifted. Hospitality, the practical love of strangers, is an obligation of every believer.²

By loving strangers, “some have entertained angels unawares.” The author’s hospitality illustration probably comes from the stories of Abraham and Lot in Genesis 18 and 19. Both men loved the strangers whom God had providentially brought into their lives; they went out of their way to show them kindness as if they were the closest of family members.³Abraham and Lot recognized that earthly hospitality approximates heaven on earth. According to Jesus, when we host the least of His brothers, we show kindness to Him (Matt. 25:40).

This text spans three distinct cultures — Abraham and Lot’s nomadic culture in which hospitality could be a matter of life or death, the first-century Greco-Roman culture into which the self-less, others-oriented Christian faith was first applied, and the post-Christian culture of readers today in which biblical hospitality has nearly given way to an industry in which few “strangers” expect to be treated like family unless they pay for it. Christian hospitality is a counter-cultural expression of the gospel of free grace that powerfully shows God’s kindness to people groaning under sin’s ostracizing influence.

Barriers to Church Hospitality←⤒🔗

To cultivate hospitable churches, we have to recognize our liabilities.

• We Struggle to Sympathize with Church Visitors. Many of us have never been like an unchurched man I once welcomed into my church study who hesitated on the threshold, almost physically unable to enter the door. Attending a new church can be incredibly intimidating; imagine visiting a mosque for the first time. Because some first-time visitors expect to not be warmly received, the church also has to work against negative preconceptions.⁴To many of us, church is like another home; for the unchurched, it is like another country.
• We Underestimate the Importance of Hospitality. Many unchurched guests are asking a single question. And it isn’t a question of theology, preaching, or programs; if these are their questions they will have likely researched your posi­tions prior to their first visit. The question is, Will I be loved? If they are not, they may move on to a church that cares about them. If they do feel loved, they might not yet need to be convinced about anything else; they might be willing to stay and learn.
  Growing organizations — even secular ones — understand the power of hospitality. Several years ago, I made an early-morning visit to a local Starbucks. The staff greeted many of the customers by name. The store manager recognized me as a guest and greeted me warmly with thoughtful conversation. I later found a more local Starbucks but never switched; I’m now “in.”
  Growing churches understand hospitality, too. Our family recently worshipped at Grace Community Church where John MacArthur pastors. We were warmly wel­comed both face-to-face and from the pulpit. After the service, we attended a special reception where we were served snacks and engaged by members of the church. Each guest was provided a complimentary book by Pas­tor John. It is no wonder that many Grace guests become frequent attenders and members.
• We Fail to Grasp Our Hospitality Shortcomings. Our churches might be far less hospitable than we suspect largely because we confuse hospitality with common decency. Common decency obliges me to greet a church guest with a hand­shake and a “hello.” Hospitality, by contrast, compels me to meaningfully enter the lives of those to whom I am not naturally drawn or connected. Too often the many smiles, handshakes, and hellos guests receive on their first visit never develop into anything more, and the visitor moves on.

A Pathway to Improved Church Hospitality←⤒🔗

Becoming a hospitable church doesn’t require compromising our principles but rather living up to our principles.

• Insist on Hospitable Elders. We tend to associate hospitality with femininity. But God makes hospitality a requirement for elders. “A bishop ... must be ... given to hospitality” (1 Tim. 3:2). Elders set the example for other men to lead their families in forming a church culture of hospitality. Non-hospitable men are not yet qualified to serve.
• Rethink Greeters. Is it best for churches to have church members rotate week to week as greeters in the church narthex? Have you noticed that all greeters are not created equal? It seems better to use competent, dedicated greeters and position them as close as possible to the parking lot. True to their calling, elders especially should be urged to engage guests prior to worship.
• Develop a Hospitable Worship Service. Our visitors should be made to feel, at the start of the service, that they are valued guests. As if opening a family reunion, ministers can extend a heartfelt welcome to visitors (without embarrassing individuals). Ministers might also explain elements of worship and antiquated vocabulary in songs, creeds, and confessions without compromising the majesty of worship. Paul encourages us to evaluate — from the perspective of a visitor — the accessibility of the songs we choose and sermons we preach (cf. 1 Cor. 14).⁵
• Develop a Church Hospitality Structure. Consider forming a hospitality committee; not to do the work for others but to ensure that the work happens, that others have an example, and that pastors and elders have follow-up con­tact information. Without a dedicated group of individuals committed to meaningfully welcome guests, it is too easy for visitors to leave unwelcomed.
• Personally Commit to Engaging Church Guests. Don’t assume others will do it. Discipline yourself to truly befriend new people at church. Learn names; write them in the front of your Bible or notebook for better recall. Ask guests for a reminder if necessary. Pray for them throughout the week; tell them the following Lord’s Day, “We’ve been praying for you.” Offer to sit next to visitors to help them participate in worship. Show them around the facilities. Invite them to your home or out to coffee. Without extended fellowship with new people, it is very difficult to move from friendly to friend.
• Help Other Members Practice Hospitality. Those gifted with hospitality should learn to bring others into conversations with new people. Try to identify strategic members to draw into conversation with guests (e.g., “Cheryl, there are a few ladies I’d like you to meet. This is Melissa; this is Becky.”).
• Quickly Integrate Guests into Your Community. We want non-members to feel like they have a place with us so that they can belong even before they believe.⁶Plug guests into small groups and other fellowship communities and encourage congregational members to develop relationships with them as early as possible.

The Only Catalyst to Hospitality←⤒🔗

God’s churches must practice hospitality. Commands alone provide insufficient motivation to obey. Besides, God has no interest in forced hospitality (cf. 1 Peter 4:9). Statistics indicating that unfriendly churches tend not to experience growth will not move us. Anecdotes illustrating the numerous ways that hosts are enriched by their guests will not stir us.

The only true catalyst for obedience to the hospitality command is a redeemed life. The writer to the Hebrews charges believers to practice hospitality because they are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken (12:28). We have been shown heavenly hospitality. For this reason God can say, even to us today, “The stranger that dwelleth with you shall be unto you as one born among you, and thou shalt love him as thyself; for ye were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the LORD your God” (Lev. 19:34).