4.1 Key themes⤒🔗

• A temperate person has a self-controlled way of life.
• To be self-controlled is the fourth mark of a mature Christian. To be self-controlled is to:
• be careful with what you think, say, and do;
• continually put yourself under the control of the Holy Spirit.
• Self-control is a very important part of the Christian life.
• You need self-control in every part of your life; for example,
  - in your emotions;
  - in your relationships;
  - in your words; and
  - in your habits.
• The Holy Spirit works through the gospel, to make us grow in self-control.

4.2 – 1 Timothy 3:2a←⤒🔗

^2a. The overseer  then must be above reproach , the husband of one wife, temperate , self-controlled.

© NET Bible

4.3 Titus 2:1-8, 11-14←⤒🔗

^1. But as for you, communicate the behavior that goes with sound teaching.

^2. Older men are to be temperate, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in endurance.

^3. Older women likewise are to exhibit behavior fitting for those who are holy, not slandering, not slaves to excessive drinking, but teaching what is good.

^4. In this way they will train the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children,

^5. to be self-controlled, pure, fulfilling their duties at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the message of God may not be discredited.

^6. Encourage younger men likewise to be self-controlled,

^7. showing yourself to be an example of good works in every way. In your teaching show integrity, dignity,

^8. and a sound message that cannot be criticized, so that any opponent will be at a loss, because he has nothing evil to say about us.

…

^11. For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all people.

^12. It trains us to reject godless ways and worldly desires and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age,

^13. as we wait for the happy fulfilment of our hope in the glorious appearing of our great God and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

^14. He gave himself for us to set us free from every kind of lawlessness and to purify for himself a people who are truly his, who are eager to do good.

© NET Bible

4.4 From temperate to self-controlled←⤒🔗

In Lesson 5 we saw that God wants us to be temperate. He wants us to think clearly and not be influenced too much by the things of this world.

In 1 Timothy 3:2 the word “temperate” is followed by the word “self-controlled.” The two marks go together. A temperate person has a self-controlled way of life. If you are temperate in your heart and mind, you will be self-controlled in the way you live your life.

To be self-controlled means to be careful with what you think, say, and do. A self-controlled person does not do the first thing that comes to his mind. He does not say whatever he wants to say. He does not allow his thoughts to go into every direction.

A self-controlled person continually puts himself under the control of the Holy Spirit. In every situation he asks, “What does the Lord want me to think (or say or do)?”

4.5 The importance of self-control←⤒🔗

Self-control is not often seen in the world today. Most people do not want to be controlled by God’s Word and Spirit. They want to be free to live in their own way. In reality they are slaves of sin (John 8:34).

Things were no different in the time of Titus. Titus was a pastor who worked on the island of Crete. The people of Crete were evil and lazy. They were liars. They loved food and wine too much (Titus 1:12). Titus did not have an easy job!

Paul wrote a letter to Titus to encourage him and to tell him what he needed to do. He had to teach the churches in Crete to live holy lives. In our passage (Titus 2:1-14) Paul speaks about self-control four times:

• “Older men are to be temperate, dignified, self-controlled” (verse 2).
   
• Older women should teach younger women “to be self-controlled” (verse 5).
   
• Titus should “encourage younger men likewise to be self-controlled” (verse 6).
   
• God’s grace teaches us “to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age” (verse 12).

Of course, Titus could not only tell God’s people to be self-controlled. He also had to show self-control in his own life (verses 7-8). And he had to appoint overseers who were self-controlled (Titus 1:8).

From Paul’s letter to Titus, it is clear that self-control is a very important part of the Christian life. Without self-control there can be no holiness. Without self-control we will become just like the people around us.

4.6 Self-control in different areas of life←⤒🔗

Self-control is needed in every area of life. For example, you need self-control in the following areas.

Your Emotions←↰⤒🔗

In this world you will experience fear, anger, sadness, worry, and every other emotion. But you may not allow yourself to be controlled by these emotions. You must rule over your own emotions, and make them obedient to Christ.

Your Relationships←↰⤒🔗

God wants you to love the people around you and to have good friendships. But you should not let your friends control your life. In every situation you should ask, “What does God want?” and not, “How can I make sure that my friend will be happy with me?”

There will also be people who make life difficult for you. You should still treat them with love (Matthew 5:43-48).

Your words←↰⤒🔗

Through your words you can help the people around you or you can harm them. That is why you should be careful with your words. Do not say whatever you want to say. Be “quick to listen, slow to speak” (James 1:19).

Your habits←↰⤒🔗

Think about your habits (the things that you do day by day, week by week, and month by month). How do you spend your time and your money? How do you take care of your body? Do you work hard? Do you rest enough? To form good habits, you need self-control. 

4.7 Growing in self-control←⤒🔗

Self-control does not come from us. It comes from the Holy Spirit (2 Timothy 1:7). How does the Spirit give us self-control? He works through the gospel. This is what we see in Titus 2:11-12:

For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all people. It trains us reject godless ways and worldly desires and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the presentage.

When Paul speaks about “the grace of God,” he is speaking about the gospel of God’s grace in Jesus Christ. The gospel “trains” us to live with self-control!

Here are three ways in which the gospel trains you to live with self-control.

1. The gospel tells you that you are a sinner.←↰⤒🔗

If you think that you are a “good” person, you will not be careful with your words, thoughts, and actions. You will think that you already know best! But if you realize that you are a sinner, you will see the need for self-control. You will be careful before you speak and act because you will know that you first need God’s help and wisdom.

2. The gospel tells you that Christ has redeemed you.←↰⤒🔗

You are a sinner, but Christ loved you. He redeemed you so that you can belong to him (Titus 2:14). If you remember this, you will always be asking yourself, “What does Jesus Christ, my Master, want?”

3. The gospel teaches you to wait for Christ’s coming.←↰⤒🔗

In this life you will always need self-control. You will need to fight against your sin and against Satan’s temptations. But one day your fight will be over. That is the day you are waiting for: the day of “the happy fulfilment of our hope in the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ” (Titus 2:13).

Think of the glory that you will enjoy in the future! Then you will have the strength to live with self-control now.