We want to consider the subject of visiting the sick. We all know what it means to visit someone who is sick. Let us first consider the difficulty of this task. We cannot tell you exactly how it must be done, but we want to try to give you an impression of the difficulties encountered when visiting the sick.

It is not easy to lead a good visit, nor to receive a good visit. There is so much suffering! There are so many crosses to bear, especially among the sick, and it does concern all of us.

What do we mean by sickness? By definition it is an abnormal functioning of the body and/or the mind that progresses unless it can be treated by medical art. The boundary between health and sickness is very difficult to delineate. By that I mean to say that there are many sick people – not only those who are lying sick on their beds.

Smytegelt says in one of his sermons that every pain that we feel is a proof that we are sick, that we must die, that we carry death with us. He compares our life to a tree that is cut down. The older people among us can remember when trees were manually cut down with an ax. That tree did not fall with the first blow of the ax. Dozens of blows were needed to make the tree fall. Even the first stroke of an ax indicates that the tree shall fall. And have not all of us felt pain? That already gives us something to think about and to pray, "Lord, teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom" (Ps. 90).

In this article, however, we will think about those whose sicknesses are evident. That need not be only those lying in bed. We are thinking also of those who are prevented from doing their daily work.

There are numerous sicknesses: inherited diseases, genetic sicknesses, infectious diseases, diseases of various organs, childhood diseases, female diseases, acute and chronic diseases, curable and incurable diseases.

This multiplicity of diseases does not make visiting the sick easier. When we go to visit them, we must consider the nature of the disease and that of the patient. The last is of great importance.

Our humanity is determined by our having a body and a soul. By this I mean that we cannot separate the human spirit from the physical. I do not mean that when the body is sick that the spiritual body is also necessarily sick. Absolutely not. But I do mean that a sick body influences the spirit. Hence we are not only concerned with sick bodies, but with sick people.

Solomon says that the spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity, but a wounded spirit who can bear? Hence there is a close connection between a man's sickness and his spirit. When the spirit is lively and at rest; when there may be quiet submission; when we may, in our physical infirmities, choose the side of God, then good will come out of the sickness. The spirit of a man sustains his infirmity. But when a relatively minor sickness comes upon us, and our spirit is restless, rebellious, and fearful, that will have an unfavorable influence. Hence, Solomon teaches us that sickness, especially a serious, enduring or chronic illness, has a great influence upon our spiritual life. Sickness affects the whole body. It involves not only the body, but also the spirit of the patient. A sickness can bring on rebellion against the Lord. A person can become desperate, fearful, and disappointed. He may panic or become apathetic. Fear and uncertainty may come upon him and master him. Darkness can distress and terrify the soul. A fearful and difficult strife can be waged, even with a minor physical illness.

We also read of this in the Bible. I think of Hezekiah in Isaiah 38. When he was told he must die, his spirit was consumed. We read nothing about the boil that caused his sickness. We read that he turned his face to the wall and wrestled with God. "Like a crane or a swallow, so did I chatter: I did mourn as a dove: mine eyes fail with looking upward: O Lord, I am oppressed; undertake for me …. I shall go softly all my years in the bitterness of my soul." We read also in Psalm 41:3: "The LORD will strengthen him upon the bed of languishing: Thou wilt make all his bed in his sickness." The spirit of man and his body are inseparable.

What I have said thus far may have raised the question: What has this to do with visiting the sick? Maybe I have mentioned things that you already know, but still it is all related to visiting the sick. I am sure that if we neglect these matters, our visit will have no profit. Also doctors, nurses, and church office-bearers must keep these things in mind. I am convinced that if we do not keep these things in mind, our visit will not be fruitful. We must realize to whom we are paying a visit. Visiting the sick is more than comforting or empathizing.

We know the story of Job. He had visitors but he came to the conclusion, "miserable comforters (or troublesome comforters) are ye all. Shall vain words have an end?" I believe that that is a wise lesson for all of us. The main thing is not what we experience from the visit, but how the patient benefits from it. Job received a visit. His three friends understood Job's circumstances, but did not understand the man Job. They saw his circumstances apart from himself. For Job that was a cross upon his cross. Someone has said, "Suffering is only unbearable when no one shares in it." Job experienced that. His three friends came to visit him; they spoke religious words, but Job still stood alone. Actually Job had no visit. He received no leading.

When visiting the sick we must learn to listen, listen and listen again. We must also learn to read between the lines; otherwise we are in danger of missing our aim, and that is to help the patient.

Then we must also think of outward things. Also our attitude determines the quality of our visit. Do not be in a hurry. Take time, even if you have no time. Be seated. Do not remain standing. Do not lay your hat on the bed. Do not even touch the bed because every movement of the bed may cause pain, thus making your visit torturous to the patient. Also when offering your hand, be careful. Give a firm hand, but do not shake it. That can cause much pain. Let us remember that the patient is sick. This all sounds very simple, but I believe these small matters can mean much to the patient. You must not stay very long, certainly not in a hospital. It may very well be that the patient is anxious for you to go, even if you have been there only five minutes. It is im­portant that you sense the situation in a sickroom because there are many aspects to consider. You do not want the visit to become a detriment.

Let us also think about what we shall say to the patient. I do not mean that we can know beforehand how the visit shall proceed, but we must prepare ourselves for it in our inner closet. We must beseech the Lord for light and wisdom to speak according to the circumstances. We do not know how we shall find the patient. That can differ from one time to another, even with the same patient. Solomon says in Proverbs 25:11, "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver." Those golden apples and pictures of silver belong together. It is like a word fitly spoken, which means a word that does not hinder, that is fitting for the given situation.

In verse 20 he says, "As he that taketh away a garment in cold weather, and as vinegar upon nitre, so is he that singeth songs to a heavy heart." We know what that means. In the winter when it is freezing weather, if you take your coat off, you will become chilled. You can make the application yourself. So also our visiting the sick can be such that the patient gets the chills, figuratively speaking. When we sing songs with a sad heart, or if we sing lamentations with a happy heart – those are words not fitly spoken. We also learn from this that our clothes must be suitable for the weather and our visit to the sick must be accommodated to their situation. That is what Solomon would teach us.

If we do not temper our visit to the circumstances, all our best intentions and edifying conversation may lose their effectiveness. Then our visit is the same as no visit. The task of a doctor and of a nurse is of a different nature. But the matters we have mentioned can also apply to them. This also applies to those who are visiting a friend of the family.

But especially I would speak about the visiting of the sick by an office-bearer. That sick person of whom we are speaking is a member of the congregation over which the Lord has placed you. You have answered "Yes" to the question "Whether you do not feel in your heart that you have been lawfully called of God's church, and consequently of God Himself?" Hence you have a calling to which God Himself has called you, a calling you yourself did not initiate. In the first place it is necessary that you are conscious of that calling. A visit as an office-bearer merely out of Christian concern is not enough. Your official visit is clearly different from a visit of a neighbor or a relative. An official visit is not just a friendly visit to have a little chat. No, an official visit is a divine charge, a very important part of your work. As an elder or minister, you are given a charge by the Lord as ambassadors of Christ, with a message from His Word to be passed on to the sick member who needs spiritual guidance and nourishment.

The Lord has set the sick member apart. The normal trend of life was interrupted. A mother in the family must put everything in the hands of others. The father can no longer fulfil his duties. A boy or girl must set his or her schoolwork aside. Sometimes the break is gradual, sometimes sudden, sometimes irreparable. For is not every sickness a breaking down of life, an interruption of the normal pattern? And that can cause so very much inward strife, uncertainty, fear, doubt, apprehension, rebellion, and many other difficulties – also, and not the least, prayer difficulties in being unable or unwilling to submit to the leading of the Lord. Often there are so many questions in the heart of the patient, and no answers. We cannot keep our minds from working.

It is our duty to visit these patients in the name of God and to help them with a word in season. Read Ezekiel 34. There we read of the work of the Good Shepherd. For every case He has various instructions and help. The Lord says as it were, "I will seek that which was lost. I will bring again that which was driven away; bind up that which was broken, strengthen that which was sick; destroy the fat and the strong." For every case He has a special word. It can also be so with our sick. "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." It is our duty to uncover the feelings in the heart of the patient, and to speak accordingly. For that is our purpose in coming. We must direct our attention to the spirit, the heart of the patient. We do not come to prescribe medication; that is the duty of the doctor. We must try to relieve and comfort the spirit of man.

When we visit the sick we cannot make do with generalities, such as "Tomorrow it will be better"; "We'll just hope for the best"; or "Pray much about it." Yes, that is true; there is no better way. But … if you cannot pray, if you dare not pray, if you do not want to pray? – then there must also be an answer. Being sick does something to a person and we must consider that also. We do not hear that in answer to our first question; "How are you today?" The answer is often, "Fairly well," or "It is going well." But if you ask further, you hear that it is not well at all, neither internally nor externally. We may think the person is bearing his cross willingly, but further conversation shows that he is not carrying his cross at all, but dragging it along. He has not submitted under it.

I once visited a sick man lying upon his deathbed. When I came to him, he was so emotional that his bed shook. He said, "Pastor, I think it is an affront that I must die."

A young woman, who the doctor said had but a few days more to live, said when I asked whether we should read a passage from the Bible and pray, "No, pastor, just go away." Not only her body was sick unto death, but also her spirit. There I experienced that the day of grace can be past while a person is still living. When the Lord shuts, who shall open? (see Rev. 3:7).

I do not think it should be necessary to say that when we go to visit the sick we should always have a pocket Bible with us. We should know our Bible and where a passage may be found. In the form for ordination we read that we must diligently search the Word of God. Also, we should know where to find that which pertains to the sick. Ask the patient what he would like you to read. Sometimes that will give you an insight into his heart which has remained hidden during the conversation. Inquire what it is that they pray for most often. An honest answer lays open the heart.

We are also commanded to pray for the sick. In James 5:14 we read, "Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord." This certainly is not the easiest part of the visit, especially since James continues: "And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him." There are circumstances in which we may and must pray more for sanctifying the cross than for removing the cross. In our heart our prayer must always be, "Lord, teach us to pray." Also in our praying we must be honest before God. We cannot always pray for recovery, although it remains true:

He hears the needy when they cry,
He saves their souls when death draws nigh,
This God is our salvation. ''Psalter 420''

I close this article not with the feeling of having said everything, but with the prayer that some instruction was given to all of us. Maybe a discovering word: I have spoken when I should have been silent, and I was silent when I should have spoken. Let us in any case always abound in the work of the Lord, not in our own strength but in the strength of the Lord who has said, "Lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world." And if we in all simplicity and faithfulness, by grace, may follow the great Master, then we shall find reconciliation in His blood for all our shortcomings. For everything depends upon His blessing. And what a wonder it shall be then when we come to the end of our journey to hear out of His mouth: "I was sick and ye visited Me"! Then the righteous shall answer Him: "Lord, when saw we Thee sick?" And the King shall answer and say unto them: "Verily I say unto you, 'Inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these My brethren, ye have done it unto Me.'" Then shall your reward from the Lord be complete!