Submission? Surely That is Not Possible!⤒🔗

How do we deal with texts such as these today? Have they been translated correctly? Are you also inclined to quickly check other translations to see whether these texts are really correct? And if it really does say this, evidently it is something that was valid then, especially in Ephesus, and apparently in Colosse too, and in Pontus, Galatia, and the other districts that Peter lists at the beginning of his first letter. This must have been written for the Christians of those days. Surely these texts no longer apply to us today?

Are we not pals in marriage? And is it not true that in the church we can also check to see who has the best talents for a particular job? In almost all areas of society women and men provide leadership equally. And so, surely you can not continue to maintain that in their marriage wives have to subject themselves to the authority of their husbands? It is Biblical to maintain that men and women are one (equal) in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:28). Both have been made in God’s image. So surely there cannot be a relationship of authority between husband and wife?

And does history not also demonstrate that when you hold on to a relationship of authority, it leads to all kinds of abuses? Very often husbands have kept their wives in a subordinate position. Wives have often been treated as inferior and used to make things as easy for their husbands as possible. For a long time women were denied equal access to education. Surely we do not want to go back to that?

Do we have to maintain that in marriage the husband occupies a distinct position as head? And does that mean that in case of an impasse, his decision prevails, so long as he acts for the benefit of the marriage and the family? Does a wife who is more intelligent than her husband have to submit to such a decision, as Kathy Keller maintains in Tim Keller and Kathy Keller, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God. Should we not instead emphasize that the man must serve rather than rule?¹

I shall address these questions below. In a couple of articles in De Reformatie, P. Dorland motivated us to think about these issues, especially in the thesis with which he concludes his articles: “At the risk of having people say, ‘Finally we get to the nub of the matter,’ I want to posit that, as Reformed people, we ought to be much more careful in speaking about ‘authority.’ Christians have also for too long tolerated evil by an appeal to submission, especially in the context of the relationship between husband and wife.”²

In this article I want to show how the Bible speaks about authority as a gift. On another occasion I plan to apply this to marriage. A crucial point that also arises in the discussion about man and woman in the church is the question whether true equality is possible within a relationship of authority.

Abuse of Authority←⤒🔗

In the course of time men have often treated women as inferiors on the basis of an appeal to the authority that men supposedly have over them. The emancipation movement that promoted the rights of women has pointed out all kinds of abuses. These occurred also in Christian marriages. Often men abused their superior physical strength and wielded authority as spiritual coercion.

Authority in the church is often used as means to secure one’s own position and to improve oneself to the detriment of others, not to mention all kinds of sexual abuse. Authority between parents and children has often degenerated to such an extent that children are harmed by its exercise. It is still quite common that the state has to intervene to take children into protection from their parents.

Governments can also misuse their positions, as sometimes becomes evident in reports of members of government and politicians who managed to have huge sums of money deposited into their bank accounts. Personal enrichment and preservation of government officials, sometimes at the cost of the lives of their subjects, is a kind of abuse that is common to all time periods. The Lord Jesus points to it as something that everyone knows about: “‘You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them’” (Matthew 20:25).

There is plenty of evidence proving that people with power abuse it: politicians who scrabble for money, judges who allow themselves to be bribed, members of government who give undue preference to their own families or their own group. It is apparent everywhere that people with authority must be monitored, that authority be limited, and that a free press can publicly expose abuses. In the church, too, financial controls, supervision, and the need to give account to each other remain necessary. Sin that is hidden in the hearts of all can evidently cause much damage, especially in relationships of authority. It is a permanent danger.

The Bible is very honest in describing all kinds of abuse of authority among God’s people. Recall, for example, king Joash, who responded to the prophet Zechariah’s criticism by murdering him (2 Chronicles 24:21-22). King Manasseh spilled so much innocent blood that he filled Jerusalem with it from one end to the other (2 Kings 20:16). False prophets set the Israelites on the wrong course by claiming that they had received their message from the Lord. And the apostles argued even into the night in which the Lord Jesus was arrested about the question of which of them would receive the most important positions in his kingdom. But the Bible does not counsel us to speak less about authority or even to cast off all authority. The abuses do not cancel out the good use of authority. It is not authority that must be opposed, but all selfish application of it.

There is No Conflict between Equality and Authority←⤒🔗

The Lord Jesus described very beautifully that we are equal:

But you are not to be called ‘Rabbi,’ for you have only one Master and you are all brothers. And do not call anyone on earth ‘father,’ for you have one Father, and he is in heaven. Nor are you to be called ‘teacher,’ for you have one Teacher, the Christ. Matthew 23:8-10

But that did not prevent him from giving authority to his apostles that would endure even into his fulfilled kingdom. The twelve will take their seats on twelve thrones and judge the twelve tribes of Israel (Matthew 19:28).

Jesus submitted himself to the authority of his earthly parents, even though he certainly was not inferior to them. And in his relationship with his Father, the Son is always the Son, although neither is identified as first or last (Belgic Confession, Article 8). Thus, the Son acknowledges the authority of his Father (and the reverse is not true, for the Father occupies a different position than the Son). Nonetheless, the Son is entitled to the same honour as his Father (John 5:23; 10:18).

When you pay attention to these examples, you can not deny that equality and authority can coexist. In the church we are all one in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:28). We are completely equal. We share in the heavenly inheritance and are all saved by the Lord Jesus in the same way. We exist on what God gives us in his grace and are allowed to be brothers and sisters in the heavenly family. Nevertheless, in the church younger people must acknowledge the authority of those who are older (1 Peter 5:5). Thus, it is apparent that equality and authority can coexist in harmony in the church. Among the brothers and sisters in the congregation there are persons who devote themselves, by the Lord’s authority, to giving leadership and correcting others. A person who gives leadership in church must not think highly of himself. He lives by the same grace as everyone else. But he occupies a different position and everyone must acknowledge it. That does not demean the others. Besides, elders are also subject to authority that others exercise over them.

Authority Is Permitted, But No Abuse←⤒🔗

There are various relationships of authority. The authority God exercises over us differs from that of the government, and the authority of office-bearers in the church differs from that of parents over children. It is remarkable how often the Bible looks at both sides of relationships of authority. It describes the obligation to accept authority and the manner in which authority must be exercised evenly.

Thus, in Romans 13 Paul requires that everyone must acknowledge the authority of the government. And he emphasizes this when he adds, "Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves" (Romans 13:2). But on the other hand he makes clear what the intent of the government’s authority is and how it must function:

For he is God’s servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God’s servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.Romans 13:4

There is a similar description of authority in the church in 1 Peter 5. The members must acknowledge the authority of the elders. They bear responsibility for God’s flock. It is their task to supervise the congregation. But here too, the authority may not be abused. The elders may not use their position for gain, but must fulfill their task with selfless devotion. They may not lord it over the members, but are expected to be examples to the flock.

Authority as Gift←⤒🔗

The Lord God clearly did not find reason to abolish authority because people often misuse it in practice. He makes clear to us what he intended in the various forms of authority and how beautiful authority can be. The various forms of authority that he instituted are his gift to human beings. They are able to contribute to harmony and well-being when God’s intention for them is respected. In Article 36 of the Belgic Confession we confess that our gracious God has ordained kings, princes, and civil officers. It is a blessing for citizens when the authorities restrain lawlessness and maintain good order in society.

Paul knew very well how governments can abuse their authority. He suffered under such abuse personally! But nonetheless he instructed us with great emphasis that we must respect the governing authorities and pray for them (1 Timothy 2:1-2).

Similarly, it is a blessing of God when he gives children parents, who have authority over them. In their position the parents can teach their children to fight against the evil to which their hearts incline them, and to show love to God and their neighbour.

Paul does warn against abuse of parental authority: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children . . ."(Ephesians 6:4), and "Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged" (Colossians 3:21). But nowhere does the Bible consider the potential abuse of parental authority as a reason to abolish this relationship of authority. On the contrary, God instituted this relationship and wants it to be maintained (Fifth Commandment). Abuse must be opposed, but the relationship must certainly not be abolished, and its good use must be promoted.

Authority As Service←⤒🔗

All the authority that human beings exercise must be dedicated to service, When we think about relationships of authority between people, we must always recall what the Lord Jesus teaches us in Matthew 20:25-28:

Jesus called them together and said, 'You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant,and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.'

That should be the tenor of the authority of the apostles. They must serve in accordance with Christ’s example. They must pass on Christ’s instruction in a trustworthy manner, point people in the right direction, find solutions to problems in the churches, and be examples themselves. Their self-interest must take second place and they must not want to place themselves in the foreground. Their concern should be the salvation and well-being of those who have been entrusted to their care. Eventually they will have to give account of their actions to their Lord.

The Lord Jesus is the example that not only the apostles, but all of us must follow when we are called upon to exercise authority. That entails regarding oneself as of no account, serving the interests of others, and making great sacrifices for that purpose. The Lord Jesus could have asserted his rights, but of his own free will he humbled himself. He has the highest authority over us and we ought to obey him without question. But he has made clear to us that in exercising his authority, he does so out of love for us. His focus is our eternal bliss. He gave his life for us. It is a huge blessing that this is how the Lord Jesus wants to be the head of the church. His authority is our salvation.

As we reflect on relationships of authority between people, we must look to him. And that is exactly what Paul does when he calls the marriage relationship a relationship of authority. We shall speak of it in the next (and concluding) article.