Someday each one of you will move away from home. Most of you will move to another community. One of the questions you will be faced with when you move is where you will go to church.

There are at least 300 recognized denominations in the United States ... besides many individual congregations which are independent. It is very likely that a community of any substantial size where you might move will have at least a Roman Catholic, Lutheran, Presbyterian, and Baptist church. There may also be a Kingdom Hall (Jehovah's Witnesses), a Salvation Army group, a United Church of Christ, or a whole host of other denominations.

With so many churches within so many denominations, how will you decide where to go?

It Starts With Me⤒🔗

We might think the place to begin answering this question is by looking at the particulars of all of these churches. But that is not where we are going to start. Each one of us must have some things clear about ourselves before we can even begin to think about a possible church.

Before you begin examining churches, you first must examine yourself. Perhaps you have already thought about what follows. Maybe you have not. Now is the time to start. The following three statements will almost always be true about us and the churches we attend:

1. If the Church is not Central to My Life, which Church I Attend will not be Important either.←↰⤒🔗

Your elders and pastors sometimes wonder why the young people they have taught in Sunday School and Catechism classes move away and attend churches which do not reflect the truth of the Bible. The answer has everything to do with this fact: there is direct connection between how important church is to you now and where you go to church when you leave home. If you are not that interested in the Bible, if you would rather not attend worship ... and then you move away from home, it is very likely it will not matter that much to you what any church says about the Bible, and what happens in worship.

Or I can also explain the same this way: what church you attend is always a reflection of your relationship with God. If you have a passionate love for God and his people, where, how, and with whom you worship Him will also matter a great deal. If you do not have that love, the place will be little more than an indifferent choice.

2. If I Date Someone whose Church I could not Attend, I should Date Someone Else.←↰⤒🔗

This statement is equally as important as the first. I recall visiting with a Reformed young lady a few years ago who was dating a very nice young man. He was, to many, perfect marriage material. He was a pre-med student at a well-respected university. He played on the football team (and played well). He came from a stable home. He was respectful when I talked to him. And he was very handsome.

The only problem was that he was Roman Catholic. And not simply in name, he told me his mother had been his catechism teacher.

Later on the two of them were married. And within a couple of years were divorced.

Meeting your dating partner's family and friends is very important. But equally important is meeting that young person's spiritual family ... and speaking openly and clearly about your faith. Go to church together. Listen to what the preacher says. Do they have a book of confessions? Read them. Show your confessions to the one you are interested in. Talk to your parents. Talk to your pastor. Together. If the two of you can agree on what you believe about God you have a common foundation upon which every good Christian marriage is built.

Now, there are exceptions to statement #2. I have seen instances in which two young people are married whose church backgrounds are very different. Before they marry they come to a firm conclusion about what church they will attend.

This is good. Far better than waiting until after marriage. But better still is to avoid this potential problem altogether following the general rule that you should not date someone whose church you could not attend.

There are far too many married people who come to I believe a month or year or ten years down the path of life that they married the wrong person. Or they believe that where they go to church can be worked out later — only to find out that they were wrong.

How do you avoid that mistake? Start by making certain you believe the same things about your God. Be united in faith first.

3. If I have not Found a Church before I Move, I Should not Move.←↰⤒🔗

This statement applies both to where you go to college as well as to what job you will accept when your education is finished.

When you make your college visits, ask questions about churches in the area as a part of the list of questions you ask the institution. If the college is not able to answer your questions, ask your pastor.

When you consider a job offer, think about where you will worship God if you accept that offer. I am certain very few of us would accept an offer if we did not have a place to buy groceries once we moved. And yet many people do move without a thought about their spiritual nourishment. The assumption is that I will find a church once I move. That is a very, very poor assumption. Don't make it.

If you have not found a church before you move, don't move.

Checklist for a Church←⤒🔗

But now, how about churches? Not every church is the same. Not every church that claims to be "Christian" actually is. In fact, there has likely never been a time in history when churches that claim to be Christian are so different. The most important differences between churches can be placed under three categories. They are …

1. Right Respect for the Bible←↰⤒🔗

2 Peter 1:20-21 tells us that the Bible comes from God. It is His words to us. The Bible did not arrive in our hands because men of many years ago decided we needed it. Rather it comes from God to us in exactly the form God wants us to have it.

So 2 Timothy 3:16-17 tells us that it is absolutely necessary that we listen and submit to what it says. The word "profitable" in these verses should be understood to teach us that the Bible is as essential to us as the air we breathe. It is profitable for us to breathe or else we will die. So also it is profitable for us to read and understand the Bible.

Since the Bible is so important we should respond to it as the Thessalonians did in 1 Thessalonians 2:13. They accepted the Bible as the words of God, and not simply as the words of men. Any truly Christian church will do the same.

You will be able to tell a lot about a church from the way it treats the Bible. If the pastor believes the Bible contains errors (is not inerrant and infallible) then that is not the church for you. If the worship service does not center on the reading and explanation of the Bible there is something tragically wrong. If Bible studies are about sharing opinions but there is no discussion about what the Bible actually teaches, then you should look somewhere else.

A church which is a biblically Christian church is first and foremost ruled by the Bible. Otherwise it is no church at all.

2. Right Worship of God←↰⤒🔗

Secondly, any church you belong to should be deeply concerned with the right worship of God. The Bible is filled with the news that we are not here to please ourselves; we are here to worship and praise God. That worship comes to its fullest expression on the Lord's Day in worship.

Deuteronomy 12:29-32 tells us we are not supposed to take our cue for how to worship from the people around us. Rather we are told, "Whatever I command you, be careful to observe it; you shall not add to it nor take away from it." The first question we must ask when we worship God is "How does God want me to...?" rather than "How would I like to?"

The Bible tells us about the attitude of worship (Isaiah 6:1-5), the timing of worship (Exodus 20:8-10,) and the contents of worship (1 Corinthians 16:2, Psalm 92:1-2, 2 Chronicles 6:13ff, etc.). In short, we must worship God as He has commanded. We dare not try to make God conform to our imaginations — whether how He looks (Habakkuk 2:18-20) or how He is to be served.

Any church that we might consider joining should be characterized by an emphasis on the true worship of God. When you come to worship there should be a sense of being in the presence of God. The Bible must be preached. There should be nothing substituted for that instruction. Infant baptism and a real Lord's Supper should be practiced. Songs must be reverent and biblically accurate. Prayer must be offered with a sense of God's greatness and Fatherly care.

If any of these are missing then that church is not for you.

3. Right Care for God's People←↰⤒🔗

The third thing you need to look for in a church is a place where God's people are properly cared for.

Yes, that means that the members should be friendly and hospitable, and there is genuine Christian fellowship. But it also means that the office-bearers of the church must show real concern for the faith and work of the members. If particular members are not believing or living as they should, that care should be shown by the use of Christian discipline.

Many Christians object to the use of Christian discipline because it is not kind. But James 5:19-20 tells us that such discipline is ultimately the kindest act possible. Usually the objection about kindness is more about a lack of conviction and courage than it is kindness.

Further, the Bible teaches us that Christian discipline is necessary. Matthew 18:15-17 lays out the pattern for discipline in most cases. The way in which the Bible speaks here does not allow us to set aside its instruction.

So important is the use of Christian discipline that our forefathers said a church is not a true Christian church unless it used discipline (Belgic Conf. Art. 29). Although not too many churches would agree with this today, it is still the teaching of the Bible.

It is very likely that most of what I have said will make little difference to you today. But there is coming a time when it should. You will be in a position where you have to make a decision about what church to join. There will be plenty of options. Your parents and your pastor will not be able to make that decision for you.

But you are still responsible to God for making the right decision. And what you have heard today makes you responsible to put it into practice (Luke 12:48b). Do not hesitate to ask your pastor for his suggestions.

Do ask questions of the pastor whose church you might join. And if all else fails, hand that pastor a copy of our confessions. Would he agree with them?

Do you?