In our Reformed churches we have the practice of house visitation (as stated in Article 23 of the Church Order of Dordrecht, 1618-19), sometimes called home visitation or more often family visitation because Reformed churches tend to count by family memberships, whether there is one member or more in a household.¹Two elders visit a family or individual to speak with them about the Word of God and how it relates to the needs of their soul and other matters relating to God’s kingdom. This is not just a social visit to speak only about monetary commitments, as is done in some churches, but at house or home visitation elders bring the Word of God as it bears on the souls and lives of the members of the congregation.

Where does the Bible Speak about Family Visitation?⤒🔗

Does the Bible mention family visitation? Yes and no. It doesn’t mention it directly, but if you turn to Acts 20:28, you will see the biblical warrant for it. Here Paul exhorts the elders who have oversight over the flock (Acts 20:28) to feed, instruct, correct, and comfort the flock. Earlier, Paul gave himself as an example: “I kept back nothing that was profitable unto you, but have shewed you, and have taught you publicly, and from house to house, testifying both to the Jews, and also to the Greeks, repentance toward God, and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ” (v. 20).

Jesus also engaged in such one-to-one care of souls. Think of Nicodemus (John 3), the Samaritan woman (John 4), and Peter at the time of his restoration (Luke 24:34).

How did we get Family Visitation?←⤒🔗

Regular family visitation began in Calvin’s Geneva. He persuaded the church to introduce it in 1550. Why did Calvin encourage it? His fundamental motive was to honour the biblical stipulations for pastoral care for individuals and families. In addition to this fundamental motive, there are three other reasons.

1. The Roman Catholic Church practiced confession, a sacrament whereby the people would confess their sins to the priest and the priest would pronounce absolution (pardon), usually with the requirement to do certain good works and/or make a payment. Of course, this is unbiblical, and Calvin and the other Reformers rejected this practice and sacrament. But they did see the need for regular house or family visitation as a form of pastoral care in which souls are honestly and biblically dealt with.
    
2. Calvin believed it was an opportunity for teaching people. In view of the fact that many persons in their youth had not been properly instructed in the Word of God, and therefore were not adequately acquainted with the teachings of the Christian faith, every year the elders had to visit the congregation from house to house and inquire into the doctrine and the faith of its members, in order that no one would come to the Lord’s table without knowing the fundamentals of salvation.
    
3. Finally, Calvin saw a clear connection between home visitation and ecclesiastical discipline. He regarded the regular visits as an effective means to exercise ecclesiastical discipline. He stipulated that at family visits the elders had to ask whether family life was harmonious and peaceful, whether there were quarrels with the neighbours, whether drunkenness occurred, and whether there was any negligence or laziness with respect to church attendance. If the report was too troubling, the family was called to appear before the consistory (church council). Calvin stated that the purpose of house visitation is to learn to know the members in order that the Lord’s table would not be profaned, and to exhort everyone to fulfill his duty towards God and hear His holy Word.

Church Order←⤒🔗

Our Church Order, Article 23 states, “the office of the elders … is … as much as possible [to] visit the families of the congregation to comfort and instruct the members, and also to exhort others in respect to the Christian religion….” The original Church Order of Dort states that the Elders “insofar as circumstances of time and place permit, [are] to do house visitation both before and after the Lord’s Supper for the edification of the congregation, in order to comfort and instruct the members of the congregation… and to persuade others unto faith in Christ.”

The Form of Ordination of Elders states that it is the office of elders … “diligently to look whether every one properly deports himself in his confession and conversation; to admonish those who behave themselves disorderly, and to prevent, as much as possible, the sacraments from being profaned; also to act (according to the Christian discipline) against the impenitent and to receive the penitent again into the bosom of the Church….” As “watchmen over the house and city of God, [they are to be] faithful to admonish and to caution every one against his ruin.”

What is Discussed at Family Visitation?←⤒🔗

1. The Word of God←↰⤒🔗

In family visitation, the elders choose a passage from the Scripture and speak about it briefly. In church, you hear the Word of God explained and applied. At family visitation, the Word of God comes by way of the elders who briefly explain it and seek to apply it. The Word touches on many areas of our lives and it is the source for having a profitable and Godcentred discussion.

2. Personal Faith-life←↰⤒🔗

The conversation about the condition of the soul and the daily walk with the Lord are at the very heart of family visitation. The elders do well to raise important spiritual questions during their visit, such as, ‘How do I receive personal faith? What does it mean to know Christ? How can I receive more assurance? What does it mean to live by the promises of God? How can I give expression to my faith in the harsh reality of everyday life? We should not be surprised if the subject of the Lord’s Supper comes up. If you attend, you should be able to speak how the Lord brought you there and what it means to you personally. If you do not attend, you should speak about that as well; perhaps the struggles or the questions you may have with respect to attendance at the Lord’s table.

3. The Unique Circumstances of the Family←↰⤒🔗

Usually, the elders will use this topic as the starting point for their conversation. They ask about the work situation of the parents and the studies of their children. They will ask about special events in the family, the birth of a baby, the graduation of one of the older children, etc. Some families encounter many trials and afflictions. The elders will express their sympathy with the sick and suffering. An important question is how the other members of the family are coping with the sickness and trials of family members or the passing away of a loved one.

4. Fruit on the Preaching←↰⤒🔗

A conversation about fruit on the preaching is an important part of family visitation. The elders will certainly want to ask whether the family is receiving spiritual food for their heart and life in the worship services and other occasions. If this is not so, the elders should pursue the reasons.

5. Personal Bible Study and Prayer and Family Worship←↰⤒🔗

The elders should emphasize the importance of personal devotions, such as Scripture reading, daily meditations, and prayer. They will ask how this functions personally and if necessary, give advice. Also, they will ask about the practice of daily family worship: Scripture reading, prayer, singing, and conversations about the relationship to the Lord and His Word among family members, childrearing, and other family life concerns

6. Living in this World←↰⤒🔗

Family visitation also concerns the broad relationships with school, work, society and government. The family may bring up various points as well. There is no topic that we encounter in life that is to be excluded from family visitation. To be sure, the topic is to be raised in connection and in light of God’s Word.

7. Other Pastoral Issues←↰⤒🔗

Elders do well to listen to the difficulties and struggles families might have. It may be that the elders have no ready-made answers to help them. Moreover, they need to recognize that their task is a pastoral one and they should not spend a long time on political and societal issues. Rather, they will stand by and pray alongside those whom they visit and together seek the way God points out in His Word.

There is also a place for admonition regarding worldliness and putting off worldly habits. Don’t be surprised if the elders ask about the school your children attend and how parents are combatting worldliness in the home. The elders have the duty to ensure as much as possible that children are taught in schools that hold as close as possible to what we believe and teach in our churches.

How Can You Most Benefit From Family Visitation?←⤒🔗

1. Consider this a Good Time to Take Stock←↰⤒🔗

Physicians often tell us to have a regular checkup. In a way, we should examine ourselves every day, and every Lord’s Day we should examine ourselves, as well as in preparation for the celebration of the Lord’s Supper. But, think of house visitation as an opportunity to see where you are spiritually, how you and your family (if there are children) are doing. It’s a time to take stock and see how and where we perhaps need to make changes.

2. Consider this a Good Time to Ask Questions and Seek Advice←↰⤒🔗

Of course, you are always welcome to contact your pastor or district elder with questions and issues. But consider family visitation as a special time to seek advice and ask questions that have been weighing on you, for which you would like more clarity. Perhaps you have been struggling with a problem that weighs you down in your study or understanding of the Bible. This is an appropriate time to ask the elders.

3.Consider this a Good Time for Spiritual Fellowship←↰⤒🔗

Elders love to report on the visits where there was a spirit of love and affection while talking about the things of the Lord, something akin to the men on the road to Emmaus. When that warmth spills over, this can be an edifying and helpful time for all involved.

4.Consider how you can Best Serve the Lord and His Cause←↰⤒🔗

Sometimes visits can focus on what members are getting or not getting from church and this is a time and place for open discussion. Consider, however, the spiritual focus, vision, love, and service intended by the family visit as way whereby everyone concerned, even the whole church, can best benefit. Family visitation will be a valuable and helpful practice if everyone would experience it as a time to be inspired and encouraged to consider how to better serve the Lord and His church. The elders have a responsibility and task here, but every church member can also contribute to make this a spiritually upbuilding practice.

May God give us to rightly use the opportunity of family visitation as practiced in our churches, and may He bless it with fruitfulness to His honour and glory.